Do you know that most people go about setting and achieving goals completely backwards? That’s right – completely backwards!
No wonder so few actually achieve big goals. Don’t give up! I’m going to share with you in this lesson why this is and specifically what you can do change this cycle and achieve YOUR BIG GOAL.
Most look at where they are and can firmly say they are not satisfied with current results. However when I ask “what do you really want?” Most have no idea. Then we’ll brainstorm a bit and they’ll tell me what they know or feel very confident they can do. That becomes their goal. Of course, I stretch them (that is my gift – gently stretching my clients beyond their comfort zone).
They change their goal to something they think they can do. They’ve stretched from focusing on something they know they can do. This is good, but we’re not there yet. So, I stretch them some more. I want them to go for their BIG GOAL. You know… the goal that is so big it excites and scares you at the same time… the goal that is in alignment with your why that is so powerful it makes you cry.
(This process is not for wimps! It’s only for those who are willing to do whatever it takes and confident enough to hire a coach to help them succeed beyond their self-imposed stopping points.)
Now comes the critical point… when they have their BIG GOAL and they have no idea HOW. They think I’m crazy when I tell them don’t worry about the how, just stay focused on your goal (the how will come step-by-step).
Most will look at their goal and look at their current results and tell themselves “I’m not where I want to be, I’m not where I want to be, I’m not where I want to be” – all day long they tell themselves this. They start to get down and depressed because it doesn’t seem to be working – this whole thing called life is not what they really want. They start missing the good ole’ days when life was simpler.
THIS PERSON IS THINKING IN REVERSE!
Thinking in reverse is twofold: when we are thinking about the past, and missing it. You cannot go back and wanting to is NOT going to get you closer to your goals. If you’re doing this… STOP.
PAY VERY CLOSE ATTENTION HERE
Thinking in reverse is also when we are looking at our goal as if it’s something out there, a destination to get to. And you’re living your life as if something needs fixed or is missing and it will be better as soon as you get to your goal.
It makes sense that living this way, we would look at current results, then look at where we want to be and focus on the gap in between, thus, becoming frustrated and even depressed. And you would argue “But I see the lack of money in my account, I see the lack of client appointments.”
It gets a little tricky, but you only want to use your current result as a benchmark of your progress, not an indication of your future.
Here’s the trick: when your mind starts taking you down the rabbit hole of “I’m not where I want to be, I’m not where I want to be, I’m not where I want to be” you have to stop your mind and refocus on the big goal as if it’s already here. See yourself in the picture (it is important to see yourself in the picture).
To help with this, have a vision board, pictures, screen-savers of your goal already accomplished. Look at these visuals often.
Action Steps –
Write down your BIG GOAL.
Stop reverse thinking. Train your mind, as discussed above. Here’s a mantra you can use, “My life is great and getting better and better every day!”
Gather visuals of your goal and look at them often.
Let me know how you’re doing with this. If you would like help, let’s set up a get acquainted session and see if it makes sense for us to work together. Contact me here so we’ll set a time to talk and see if I can help.
We would love to hear from you! Please click on “leave a reply” at the end of this posting and share your comments – What is your favorite nugget you got from this, today? What are you most excited about implementing from this “Yes I Can With A Plan! Bright Ideas” edition?
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Lisa Long is an author, speaker and success coach helping businesses and individuals overcome sabotaging obstacles so get the results they want and live the life they truly desire. She is available for workshops, keynote, team and one-on-one coaching. Contact Lisa at: 928-284-9285, firstname.lastname@example.org, www.YesICanWithAPlan.com